Life and Death and all that is in between

Tonight I witnessed sheer joy embodied in my child. I filled the kitchen sinks up with water and let Logan stand in the beloved learning tower with one cup and a spoon. 30 minutes later I had to practically detach him from the learning tower to throw him in the tub and get ready for bed.

In between I felt a myriad of emotions. As Logan played in the water, busy scrubbing the counters or pretending to put out fires, I read a series of emails from my father describing his journey with my grandfather. My grandfather is dying and my dad spent two weeks at his side in palliative care.

My brain scrambled to take in all that I was reading, my thoughts punctuated by gleeful laughter.

And, so this is life, these amazing moments filled with incredible emotions that boil down to deciding whether to succumb to my own pain as my marriage ended and my grandfather dies or to instead join in the glee.

I joined in. We splashed, we played, we drenched the kitchen. He told me stories. He wants to go to hawaii with his friend Grant. He wants to take a spaceship with the aliens to the bottom of the ocean (read "Flotsam"). He wants to fish for sharks in the bathtub - they are yellow and blue and green and purple. He wants to start at his new daycare tomorrow as he has declared the old one moldy. And he never wants to sleep again. And with all of that, who couldn't be filled with glee.